Friday, January 21, 2011
Thursday, January 20, 2011
Texas Tourists
A couple from Texas were taking a cross country drive, taking in sites they couldn't get back home.
The couple started arguing about the pronunciation of the town's name. They argued back and forth until they stopped for lunch, where they knew they could settle their bet as to how it was pronounced by asking a local.
When it was their turn the man asked the cute young thing behind the counter, "Before we order, could you please settle an argument for us?"
"I'll try," promised the local.
"Would you please pronounce where we are -- very slowly?"
"Sure," said the blonde girl. She leaned over the counter and said, "Burrrrrrgerrrrrr Kiiiinnnnng."
While driving through Wisconsin, they were often boggled by the place names, which peaked as they were approaching Oconomowoc.
The couple started arguing about the pronunciation of the town's name. They argued back and forth until they stopped for lunch, where they knew they could settle their bet as to how it was pronounced by asking a local.
When it was their turn the man asked the cute young thing behind the counter, "Before we order, could you please settle an argument for us?"
"I'll try," promised the local.
"Would you please pronounce where we are -- very slowly?"
"Sure," said the blonde girl. She leaned over the counter and said, "Burrrrrrgerrrrrr Kiiiinnnnng."
Wednesday, January 19, 2011
Department of Labor Investigation
The North Dakota Department of Labor claimed a small Bismarck farmer was not paying proper wages to his help and sent an agent out to investigate him.
Department of Labor employee: I need a list of your employees and how much you pay them.
Farmer: Well, there’s my farm hand who’s been with me for 3 years. I pay him $200 a week plus free room and board.
Then there’s the mentally challenged worker. He works about 18 hours every day and does about 90% of all the work around here. He makes about $10 per week, pays his own room and board, and I buy him a bottle of bourbon every Saturday night so he can cope with life. He also sleeps with my wife occasionally.
Department of Labor employee: That’s the guy I want to talk to… the mentally challenged one.
Farmer: That would be me.
Department of Labor employee: I need a list of your employees and how much you pay them.
Farmer: Well, there’s my farm hand who’s been with me for 3 years. I pay him $200 a week plus free room and board.
Then there’s the mentally challenged worker. He works about 18 hours every day and does about 90% of all the work around here. He makes about $10 per week, pays his own room and board, and I buy him a bottle of bourbon every Saturday night so he can cope with life. He also sleeps with my wife occasionally.
Department of Labor employee: That’s the guy I want to talk to… the mentally challenged one.
Farmer: That would be me.
Atlanta Mourns Loss of a Special Person
Royal Marshall, producer of the Neal Boortz syndicated radio show, dropped dead Friday night of a massive heart attack at the age of 43. Royal was known for his quick wit and his ability to parry Neal. What better way to remember him than this.
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